2012 has not been a pleasant year for me for many reasons. Migraines have plagued my very existence for the majority of January and part of February. Definitely not how I envisioned I'd be spending my time. Our life has been on hold pretty much since right after Christmas. And yes, that does mean our Christmas tree is still up. Totally embarrassing! We've finally managed to get all the ornaments down and packed nicely in the ornament storage boxes. We just have to put the angel away and then tear down the tree. We're making progress!
I missed two weeks of our homeschool group days but made it there last week. I'm worried about tomorrow as it's almost 3:00 AM and my brain has yet to shut down. Insomnia stinks and it's not helpful in keeping headaches and migraines away. So here I am, in the hours of the morning, trying to rid my mind of the senseless clutter that keeps bouncing around in my brain. Why did I ever look at a friend's Facebook post that compared Sinatra's music to Justin Beever's? Yep, you probably guessed it, I've got "Baby, baby, baby, ohh" echoing in my brain. Gracious, you'd at least think it would grab onto something I like and something a little more conducive to sleep! But Noooo, mine latches on to something I couldn't even tolerate in the first place!
I have an appointment tomorrow, or is it today since it is now 3 AM, with my neurologist. I'm praying that she will figure out why I've been having so many debilitating headaches. I just want to be rid of them. For good!
Violet has been such a blessing during this time. We've managed some school work but honestly, we are pretty behind right now. Thankfully we have a six week break next week and spring break next month. Those will be our catch up days. After that we will be back on track. Violet's reading is slowly improving. We've crossed our biggest hurdle, which was just the desire to learn to read. She is seeing her classmates reading and it has ignited that spark to learn to read. She brings me books and is asking to read now. That is a huge milestone for us when you consider she would either hide or immediately break into tears if we pulled out her reading curriculum! I cannot begin to explain how happy this make me and Gregg! I've been researching tutors, trying to decide if someone else would have better luck with this than I have. I'm putting those on hold for now. It feels good to have some optimism regarding reading again!
This has basically been our life the past few months. Excruciating pain, trying to keep up with the ins and outs of our daily life and still falling behind in everything... School, housework, chores, and getting down our Christmas tree! Despite all these things though, one thing has remained and held true for us - God has been right there with us, in the midst of everything, never leaving us and certainly never forsaking us. He has been our comforter throughout all of this. When I was at the end of my proverbial rope, He helped me hold on and gave me the strength to make it through all of this. I have a merciful Father who loves me dearly and cherishes me as His beloved daughter just as He loves you in the same way. It would be all too easy for me to give up and let the physical pain swallow me into the pit of despair but that is not Gods plan or will for my life, that is from the enemy who comes to steal, kill, and destroy those who follow Christ. I am determined that no matter how I may feel physically, I am going to hold onto the truth that God loves me and through Him I will be restored to full health, whether it's here on earth or in heaven, He will restore me to full health!